Today I read an article about how women chase men away.
When we email them, when we text them, when we ask them how they’re feeling or when we initiate making plans, we are chasing them away. The article states that men should be the ones to do these things as they are the men, thus the hunters, and have to be the ones to chase in order to maintain interest in the relationship.
Are you frickin kidding me? What year is this??? I’m not going to lie, my blood boiled.
Seriously, if you’re emailing someone or texting them and they run away or hide, this is not the droid you’re looking for sister.
He has some serious work to do. This is not chasing, this is communication. This is something that humans have been doing, well forever. You’re dealing with some wounds here. You’re dealing with someone with some unconscious issues that need to be looked at and healed. There may be some worthiness issues, commitment, vulnerability, or even intimacy issues. You have no way of knowing and playing into this cat and mouse game doesn’t solve them, it just frustrates you.
Conscious masculine doesn’t run and hide when you text them or try to initiate plans. I mean some people are shy, but c’mon, we’re supposed to be in an equal society here and I’m supposed to believe that men are the only ones that can make moves because they’re the hunters and need to be the only ones that chase?
This just smacks of patriarchal conditioning.
We’ve heard it all before. Women have too many feelings or they want to connect too deeply so they chase men away. Men scare easy and we should sit around and wait for them to come to us. Don’t do anything to upset the apple cart or be too loud or he’ll flee under the bushes. This hide and seek bs is such an insult to authentic masculine essence, it really is. This crap basically teaches that men are children and they need to be treated as such in order to facilitate the desired response from them by using tricks and that’s wrong. This isn’t men. This is an outdated patriarchal typecast that has been perpetuated for way too long.
Everyone has busy lives and you want to leave it up to another person to make all the moves? Talk about pressure on the masculine now. So we sit back and fan ourselves on the front porch sipping lemonade and waiting for Prince Charming to get interested? Hell no. Everyone should put effort into relationships. This whole concept that men need to be the ones to chase is right back up there with the fairy tales that we need to be saved. It takes away our power, our ability to choose and our right to go after what we want. We’re fierce women dammit. We’re not going to sit around waiting to be chased. We will not have our fate chosen for us.
Now why would the patriarchy want this to be the typecast of men and for women to behave in this way?
Because it doesn’t benefit the feminine at all. It puts us squarely in the passenger seat and at the whim of what someone else wants. We end up sitting around and waiting on the desires of someone else. We silence our needs, our passion and put ourselves last. Sound familiar? It’s been the way women have been treated for thousands of years. And we’re not doing it anymore. This type casting needs to end and we need to acknowledge the equality between partners, not further create a divide by playing games. Patriarchy wants us as women to shut down and swallow our feelings and voice, hide our desires and play into some delusion that men can’t handle our truth. That’s such bs.
This gives no credit to men. Look around, there are lots of conscious men that don’t get any credit with these kinds of paradigms. And there would be a lot more if they broke free of this old tripe. And it’s up to us to do so.
The worst part? This article was written by a woman trying to solicit dating advice to other women.
Ladies, don’t fall for it. If you have to play this level of games with someone just to get them to be interested, it is 100% NOT worth your time. I can guarantee you there will be headaches galore down the line. They have wounding they need to deal with and nothing you do will change this. You can’t love deep enough to heal someone else’s wounds, they have to do it themselves.
You deserve someone that has done their work and CHOOSES to be with you. Not chases you when you ignore them or feels the need to connect with you when he’s in charge. Do you really want someone you need to employ mind games and use tricks on? Do you want someone you can’t be your true self with? Either they want to make the effort or they don’t. We all have wounds we need to heal, but hiding from them doesn’t get the job done.
You don’t need that kind of hassle. You’re worth more than that. You’re worth someone who sees your truth and actively wishes to be with you, not someone who plays games. You deserve to be chosen not chased. You’re a woman, not a mouse. Never forget that.
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